Potential

 Time Wasted : 

    While I m studying Google Project Management Course. The points that I am learning makes me ponder about the things I have done. I have just wasted pure time. 20 years of my life. Just for chatting and drinking and beaches. There should be a limit and I have crossed that limit and gave out signal that I m not interested to construct a good life. So the life I m living is my choice. It is sad that unknowingly many people like me are wasting their pretty life. 

    They Do not plan like me, Just live with what they got and move on. It is really a waste pool of talents and time. The loss of their time and their money and their life. Like mine. I thank God that I am able to see and thank him that when a Man(Woman) who ever wants to turn and get himself right. He is will help and that is what he is doing to me right now.

    I think I am at phase where God is showing what should have been done and what did not happen. It is a lot of waste. I should have applied Lean Sex Sigma rule to my life. That would have recovered a lot of things. But hey what am I to blame myself. Even this life is "Un ka Diya hula hai". It is really very very blessed part. 

I think I have hidden talent of writing stories. With all these years of roleplaying. I think I am good at narrating. I want to make short films and publish them. I know the director or I can be the director. I have money, I can be a producer. I need to find ACTORS. All I need is a crew that can help me make films. I will do that once I have finished this certification. 

Okay that is it for now. 

Had Great X-Mas time.

 I believe this is first time My brother JOHN ever focused on family. The change is positive we all had good time watching TV and more. I also eaten heavyly 1 plate noodles, 1 burger and box of almond biscuits. Daam I got to check my sugar levels.

I created the list of things that I always wanted to do. I need to figure out plan to make them work. I got to set my time table so that everything can come to life. 

I did not participated in Church Service at night nor the noon. I allowed my mother to take care of that. I think I need to focus on myself and my character so that I can be that righteous Preacher and Shepherd that I always wanted to be. 

From Jan 2023, I think I will bring in that Pastor in me and that coder in me and that fitness guy and the musician oh the dancer.

I have to make plans to start my dancing ministry. That be an awesome way to spend time. You would not know time and will have good exercise. To do list is to find good dancing institute that can teach me to dance and create Flash MOB dances in city square. I don't know if I go solo or group. But I can stand and share testimony and preach the Good news to the lost children who are loosing hope now a days. This is my all time dream.

Well coding to become an ethical hacker so that I can feel myself at power. I want to hack into system and have a good peek and see and learn. those great codes.

Playing guitar at first and sing few songs then slowly start to dance would be a good way to attract crowd. Well I really should have done that when I had opportunity. I had funds and I had time and I had resources. 

Sin that worth it :

Boy one mistake and it cost you a lot. But what if that mistakes worth it. Give at the price I pay. I don't know mistake a sin worth it. Is it that good experience to commit that sin and suffer life long. Well my SIN opened new doors and it has pushed me to go through things I always wanted to. Whom am I going to blame. Should I blame myself for committing that SIN. Should I be happy that because of that I am able to pursue the dream of self sustainability of hostels and churches. I don't know. We got to see.

Self Sustainability:

My life dream is to create a hostel that is self sustainable not depend on donations but create an income stream that generates enough funds to run a hostel and copy it to whole Andhra Pradesh. 

My other dream is to make Church self sustainable not ask alms from the politicians or rich people. But have resources of our own. I did succeeded at this by saving all the weekly donation box and not to use any of the money that people put in the donation box and open that once year on Christmas. I had success at that. I failed to put in the tithes but boy if I did, I would have enough money to make Christmas a blast. 

Legacy: 

I wanna leave legacy of the things that I accomplish to my children, So when they grow up they won't be running after or chasing some chicks or boys. But to focus on building an Empire that lasts and survives and thrives through difficulties. I wanna build 10 industries that can bring tithes to church and help community. 

Community : 

I had a dream of building community like at the time of apostles, where every one sold off their lands and belonging and put them at the feet of apostles so that they can bring better glory and build a Equality. Where there is no salary to people. Their food their house and their needs would be met by the community and all people are treated equally no special treatment for manager or janitor. Where every one is same and every one got to work to prosper the community resources. There will be a wing to take care of kids and children. There will be addictions support, there will be talent improving training sessions. There will be community challenges where people show of their extra skill and so on. I need to clearly write it out before I can explain it to anyone. 

Well this is it for now, I had good time on Christmas. 

Done Google first step certification of project management

 I have prepared some list that I wanted to do. I have these thoughts and never really penned it. I am able to put all my thoughts together and penned them down. 

Pastor Things

Do I really want to lead life as pastor. Shepherding these people. Am I righteous enough to lead people into righteous life of Jesus. I don't think so. I do not have the character to lead these people. 

Should I Quit then. No, Why did't I thought this through. I even taught myself sleep without a fan, Leave the AC. I can sit and bit by mosquitoes and still feel nothing. I thought I become a preacher who goes to remote areas and preach the good news and help people realize that there is hope for all of us. There is a God that gives us second chance. 

Healing is what every one is selling these days on TV and Miracles are what they market. They ignored the GOOD NEWS. Which is we have father who understand our inequalities and who understands that we are not perfect and still loves us. If I tell that no body give me money. If I can perform Miracle, then people get attracted wanted to have a miracle in their life too. So that draws them near. I can't deny the fact that JESUS did do some miracles, But at the same time, when parties requested for Miracle he outright denied and called them Sinners. 

So how do I deal this pastor thing. Don't know the answer and can't tell anything as of now. 

Changing career from PG OWNER to Developer to project manager

Well with all those hard days, drenching in rain, and tieing up the cover that protects amazon deliveries from rain. I thought to my self, O god. Just open the door so that I can learn coding and learn stuff for an year and my brother would help me and support me for an year. And magically it has happened.. I did sung a song "LIFT Karadey", adanan sani song. and telugu song "Govinda Govinda , nanu bagu cheyi Govinda , and NTR song devuda devua hai bhagavan song. They just gave me some sukhoon. But these songs really made me cry from heart. My eyes got wet and thought all of the good things I used to have and remembered my arogance. But it is good experience now.Then the magic happened. Its like there is God who really listens to our prayers if we pray from the bottom of our hearts. Right now I m embarking in to the journy of coding. While coding i relised I have tried codding before when the CARONA was rampent. I was sitting in my room learning PYTHON coding. I did completed a lot of stuff. Wonder why I have stopped. Right now I have half done with google project management certification. I m confident that I would complete it and will be another feather in my profile. I m also confident that I can complete the scrum and agile certifictions along with google certificaiton. Javascript is huge and vast subject, so taking time to sink in all the code language into my brain. So that when I write jargon of codes. I don't need to go back to verify my basics. My journy, Hostel tutor to WARDEN, => MANAGER => BUSINESS DEVELOPMENT EXECUTIVE => VODAFONE CUSTOMER CARE => COMPUTER SERVICE ENGINEER => PHARMACIST => AMAZON CUSTOMER CARE AND GAMING SPECIALIST => NOW LEARNING PROJECT MANAGEMENT AND CODING. Oh I forgot , the delivery boy during CARONA and before CARONA.. Door to door sales man when I m in hyd , I was 17 at that time. I was a palmist , tried hypnotism, then became preacher , was good pastor after I got married and now I failed that obligation because of my addiction to alcohol. But I m recovring now. I feel that I don't need alcohol, I think I can start my new healthy addiction which is "FITNESS". My knee is not supporting me. I don't want to brusie it by walking long walks. I got to see doctor about it. ahhh i poured my heart today. I m happy so i will end now. OH wait. I have more than 180,000 views on google maps. I m at level 6.. On pinterest I got over 1 million subcribers now it was dow to 10,000. So anyway.. that is all I can write now...

What a beautiful day

Not me ... Its my brother who is getting engaed to this beautiful gal. Who has brains coz she is nerologist. I never experienced a 5 start hotel environment and the way they treat customers. I had bad really bad experience as a customer and also you see those deming short films wherey they treat customer with disrespect. But here it is 5 start experience. Although my brother invitied a person whom I do not like. I got raged but kept my cool, It is his engagement and he gets to decide whom he wants. Well it all went well. No religious stuff and all. My kids had a blast that for sure , Anne and alex get to play in terrace of 5 start hotel, which I would not afford to give that kind of experience. It is really very great experience as kids point of view. So it now official my brother now can't do bachelor stuff anymore. Hehehe welcome to the club bro... It is good to write about my day. I think I m liking it.

My day

A typical day. I had lot to think about. I have contemplated on my alochol addiction. I have thought about my chatting addiction. I have thought about my phone addiction. I think She is right about fitness addiction. That is a healthy addiction. Shopping is a grevious activity that I m not fond of. But My brother requested me to be with him. I don't know why. He knows better than me. He has good taste in dresses. But Still assisted but my sleep apnea took over and I slept or dozed of most of the time. But I m surprised to see a paid of shoe costing more that 15,000. So my brother would be walking on 15000 from tommorow presumably. When I said is it worth it. His excuse is that they cost way more than here in the USA. I can see a spending frenzy which I have not fond of. I don't know understand how people spend so much of money just to show some lue vutan or some van husen or some brank. I believe the quality is different or I can't really tell. But in every mall they have same shops, same peter england, same van husesn, same jokey or what ever. But every mall have same bran shops. Only those brands are getting good sales I tell you that. I like the coconut drink. It is very tasty. I should plan something like that in my shop. It would be great idea. Drinking and chatting are the addictions/demons that I should be fight. They are the demons that I have welcome into my life. I need to throw them away. I got to clean up or cleanse things. I think I will start my book reading habbit again. But nothing interests me anymore as they have the same content which I have read years ago. Nobody got anything that challenging ... WEll my day ended with 2 cigarates and quarter bottle of KYRON.

Exploring the Unexplored

You know sometimes you feel like to go and just go some random place. Where you know bobody and no nothing of that place. Just keep on walking and watching all those roads and building and all that that place has to present. It give me excitement. I want to repair my avenger and go on long ride this time. The explorer side of me asking me to take a trip to Leh Ladak or some place. I am not sure I am physically fit to do that. I need to have some plan and discipline to do these sort of stuff.